karrau village waters are polluted because gold trumps life in guyana

first the rainforest is burnt down to clear space for the dig. i’ve seen this firsthand. it’s horrific

mark jacobs lives!

contrary to popular mythology mining adds nothing to Guyana society
sure some fools throw up big buildings and fantasy island resorts
other jokers drive fancy cars and pick ups
and whatever other fancy trinkets gold people buy
but trust me gold mining takes more from this country than it will ever add

the record will show gold mining is a negative drag on the lives of our population and a cancer to the environment
stop looking at those gold account numbers in the billions
it will never and i say never be a positive force
and i dont care how much more you keep digging

add up the rapes, murders, choppings, stabbings, the disappeared, the dead rivers, creeks and lakes where NOTHING lives
hold on for a second and think about this
you go into the amazon basin of guyana and there are water ways and creeks and lakes where…

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Mind Power Techniques – Heal Your Life // Dr Joe Dispenza

very useful and worthwhile listen. for any/all interested in change and changing #transformation

mark jacobs lives!

Mind Power Techniques – Heal Your Life // Dr Joe Dispenza.

Dr Joe Dispenza’s passion is to take complex scientific information and share it in a simplistic and allegorical way for all to understand with the intent of empowering you and making a difference in your life! Mind Power Techniques – Heal Your Life // Dr Joe Dispenza.

From metacognition to epigenetics and neuroscience, Dr. Joe explains why change is so hard and what it means to truly change. He shares how your personality creates your personal reality and that your brain is not hardwired to be a certain way the rest of your life. Mind Power Techniques – Heal Your Life // Dr Joe Dispenza.

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monarch meditation

the other day i was listening to a video in which a man who talks about meditation and the mind told a story about a woman who asked for a sign that she was doing the right thing/ living the right way. that day, as she drove down the road, a bald eagle flew into her car and landed on the dashboard. she pulled over to the side of the road and after a few minutes, the eagle flew out.

i haven’t asked for any signs.

for a long time, i’ve felt like i’m on the cusp of something really awesome. i’m not sure exactly what this thing is, don’t seem to have the words to describe it, but it attracts me. i know it’s there; some unnamed sense of mine can sense this thing. but it’s like i’m blind and groping in a dark room during blackout. i have found no guides. i take one step forward, but then two back. the thing, whatever it is, remains, still exuding attraction. i hope that one day i will reach and know it.

yesterday, by my garbage bin in the kitchen, there was a butterfly- a monarch. pumpkin used to catch and eat them regularly, at the last place we lived. i would find bits of orange wings when i swept. this one looked intact though it was lying flat on the ground, with fuzz and strands of my hair entangled in its legs. i thought it was dead. but when i tried to pull away the hair, it fluttered to an upright position, freaking me out. i am disturbed by flying things that should be outside under the sky being inside under a roof.

it was alive. i got down on my hands and knees and looked closer. the floor was dirty. i am a lackadasical housekeeper. a trail of ants moved busily somewhere, just around the butterfly. they weren’t actually touching or bothering it tho. pumpkin was asleep on a chair somewhere. the butterfly was whole, seemingly undamaged, beautiful orange and black on the white tile floor. what was it doing in here, i wondered. it looked weak. it stayed flat on the ground for a long time. but then, once in a while, the wings would flap open and closed.

it remained like this for several hours. i kept checking it. i mixed some sugar and water and put it in a plastic container lid on the ground nearby. the monarch fluttered upright again, moving away slowly, dragging one leg. was it injured, i wondered? maybe it was dying. i know butterflies don’t live that long. i left it alone then. but later, seeing it still lying on the ground, i slid an old newspaper nearby. pumpkin had awakened and i was worrying that she would see it and make a meal of it. but she didn’t and went out the other door instead. the butterfly moved onto the paper. i decided that i would move it after i ate my lunch.  but before i could bring the spoon to my mouth, the butterfly soared into the air! it flew by the window a couple of times then landed on an old batik wrap that i have covering a barrel which serves mostly as a place for pumpkin to lie down and survey things from.

my heart soared with the butterfly. it was alive! it had the energy to fly! carefully, i gathered up the wrap and walked with it to the door. i watched as the butterfly flew up and over the fence, into the next yard. it disappeared among the leaves of the almond tree. i’m not sure what, if anything, that monarch was a sign of. maybe that sometimes you need a quiet place to rest before moving again? that even tho a place might be foreign and have dirt and ants and danger, it could still be a haven, albeit temporarily? that sometimes you just need to be left alone for a while, don’t need anybody’s well meaning attempts at help? that sometimes what seems like death isn’t really? that sometimes you can fly better than you can walk? or maybe none of this at all. i’m not trying to understand. i’m just observing. and giving thanks.

butterfly lying down2
monarch flat on the dirty floor
butterfly lying down
sign of life
butterfly- wings open3
monarch and ants
butterfly on batik
monarch on batik

butterfly on batik- open

 

I am with Papa Legba at a Crossroads

1981

I keep having these dreams. Last night’s dream just made sense to me. I keep having dreams that I am attacked or surprised by something and I have to fight to get away. Last night there was a huge snake in the backyard of my house in Spanish Town. It was so huge and had the head of a crocodile. It was coming to eat me . I was rescued by my father who killed it with his machete. It came from nowhere but it was a really huge snake. Why am I always escaping?

I am worried..worried that my life is a daily plot to escape. Today i met with a friend in cafe blue. We talked about being here, being away, being an academic not wanting to leave Jamaica. Having to leave Jamaica, what we could do to stay. But somehow it all seems like plotting to escape…

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